|
|
Insufficient
Excess
* V. Michelle Obradovic, Esq.
Abraham Maslow began studying and writing about motivation in the 1940s. He
used a triangle to classify his hierarchy of human needs that also
demonstrated how each lower level need must be met before a human being is
able to attempt to meet the next higher level of need. The lower level  included
physical needs like shelter, food and water, and above that safety, then love
and belonging, and then esteem, with actualization being at the very tip-top.
Maslow later described people at that top level as being problem-focused,
appreciative of life, concerned for personal growth and able to have
meaningful experiences. He eventually added another level above actualization
for when people were able to connect with something beyond themselves and/or
were able to help others to realize their potential: transcendence.
So, why is it that many of us feel our increased standard of living has not
necessarily delivered us to an improved quality of life? One ‘values theory’
approach suggests that when the focus is on accumulating and protecting
individual material wealth, less attention is given to strengthening communal
bonds and relationships, resulting in psychological tension, which raises our
stress level and reduces our sense of well-being. Of course, your answer will
depend in large part on your value system.
Each of our value systems define for us what is important, what is right and
good, how we should live and for what we should strive. For example, if you
tend to concern yourself with building and maintaining strong positive
relationships, then your value system will likely be one that reinforces
social obligation, self-restraint and that also discourages indulgent
behaviors. If you tend to concern yourself with extrinsic goals such as
prestige and recognition, or attainment and expressions of wealth, then your
value system is likely to be one that reinforces production, ownership,
individual achievement and advancement.
How these value systems play out in our daily lives could go something like
this: My spouse/parent/sibling/in-laws will understand that I am missing
‘family night’ because this contract/brief/presentation/report has to be
perfect. Or instead: The project is in good shape and my
team/boss/employees/client will understand that I can not work late because
it is ‘our family night’. Which is the more common scenario for you? Which is
more acceptable? Do you feel that no matter what you do, someone is getting
short-changed; either there is not enough time to do all the things that must
be done or there is nothing left in you to be the person that you need to be?
In his Encyclical Letter Centesimus Annus No. 36, Pope John Paul II
(1920-2005) wrote: “… a great deal of educational and cultural work is
urgently needed, including the education of consumers in the responsible use
of their power of choice … It is not wrong to want to live better; what is
wrong is a style of life which is presumed to be better when it is directed
towards "having" rather than "being," and which wants to
have more, not in order to be more but in order to spend life in enjoyment as
an end in itself. It is therefore necessary to create lifestyles in which the
quest for truth, beauty, goodness and communion with others for the sake of
common growth are the factors which determine consumer choices, savings and
investments.”
Rabbi Nachman of Breslov (1772-1810) wrote “A person needs great wisdom and
understanding in order to prevent money from destroying all the days of his
life.” (Likkutei Moharan 23:5). He is said to have often discussed Exodus
23:5, which is translated: "If you see the donkey of the one who hates
you collapsed under its load, you shall prevent yourself from passing him by;
help, you shall surely help with him." Rabbi Nachman saw the donkey as
the human body running after desires and whose deeds have brought dishonor.
The spirit is immobilized because the body is weighted down and trapped by
gross materialism. It cannot rise without help. It is in need of help twice
over, ah'zov ta'ah'zov, assistance with the physical burden, and spiritual
aid. He taught extensively about tzedakah, teshuvah and tefilah –
righteousness, repentance and prayer, and also about Shabbat, with the idea
being that time is needed to cease, to remember and to enthusiastically meet
the spiritual.
Sura Sad of Al Qur'ân Al Karîm (38:30 through 38:54) speaks of two devoted
men, Solomon (Sulayman) and Job (Ayyub). Both men were tested, one by having
it all and the other by loosing everything he had. Solomon owned many
beautiful horses, and one day he forgot to pray because he was admiring them.
As the sun set he realized how he had put himself in jeopardy, so he sent
them away and asked forgiveness. In comparison, Job did not waiver, even when
his cattle were destroyed, his servants killed, his roof fell in, his health
was lost and his friends and family abandoned him. His story is further told
in Sura Al-Anbiyya (The Prophets, 21:83-84), Sura Al-Nisa (The Women, 4:163)
and Sura al-An’am (The Cattle, 6:84).
If you think all these ideas are not within our reach, consider that Maslow
noted that self-actualized people can still be ‘boring, stubborn, irritating
and equipped with silly wasteful thoughtless habits’. Further, that his
initial inspiration was an article he read in “American Naturalist” when he
was 27 years old. It described a study that was conducted with barnyard
chickens. The chickens were allowed to choose their diets from a variety of
food sources; some containing more nutrition than others. The chickens that
consistently chose well grew strong and healthy. The chickens that chose
poorly were sickly and scrawny. When the scrawny chickens were confined to
the foods selected by the healthy chickens, they too grew stronger and
healthier. When the restrictions were removed, they returned to their
previous behavior.
“The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our
blessings.”
Eric Hoffer (1902-1983)
*V. Michelle Obradovic, Esq.
lives in Birmingham, Alabama. She is a former litigator and trial attorney
and is and owner of Wise
Resolution, LLC. Her general mediation practice also includes complex
litigation, mass torts and class actions. She is an Associate Adjunct
Professor at Samford University, Cumberland School of Law.
|
